Friday, August 23, 2013



I got 5 on it....(yep I sure did sing that again :) )

Here it is....My 5 on Friday...

5.  Have I mentioned I hate the beginning awkward stages of a relationship?

4.  Can't wait until tomorrow and Rani's baby shower for Marley Joy

3.  I am glad that I finally got to donate blood again.  Anytime I schedule to I forget or run out of time.  Donating blood is so important!  My brother in law has had to have a big trasfusion as well as my Aunt Von.  Especially if you have a rare blood type like I do (O negative) it's VERY important you donate.  Your blood can go to anyone that needs it!  Donate today!

2.  Is it 5 yet?

1.  I am really really REALLY digging my outfit today.  Including the accessories of jewelry and my nails.  I love it when things come together for the good!

Do your own 5 on Friday!  Simply blog about the 5 things that are on your mind and then link it up at April of A. Liz Adventures blog and you're done!  Happy Friday!

Who doesn't {love} to shop?

I'll take "Best place to get personlized, home made, or vintage items" for $500 Alex....

"What is Etsy?"

I love {online shopping}!  It's amazing!  I love being able to shop in my pj's, on a Saturday morning, while sitting on my back porch drinking coffee.  What else could be better?  Here's the Show Us Your Life for this week, our favorite online shop sites!

So of course my first online site that I absolutely love is Etsy.  Specifically these shops:

Southern by Choice
I {love} anything Texas.  I am a very proud Texan.  I have this painting up in my house that I purchased from another Etsy store (the shop I bought it from is currently closed :( )

*Side Note:  This is a replica of the painting that Carrie Bradshaw puts in her apartment after she and Big call it quits because he left her at the alter.  She moves out and she redoes her apartment.  The only difference is the O in her love is a British flag*

Southern by Choice's stuff is so amazing!! It's all custom made so you're getting a one of kind item.  Check her out!  She is amazing to work with!

Fiesty Babies
I have a soft spot for nostalgic items.  This site has the cutest onsies for baby's that have to do with things from the 80's and 90's.  For a friends baby I bought the onsie with Notorious B.I.G. and it has his face and it says "It's All Good, Baby Baby".  I also got my niece one that has Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Gray on it from Dirty Dancing that says "Nobody puts baby in a corner".  How awesome is that?!  I need to figure out who has baby's right now that I can buy more for :)

3L Photography
I absolutely positively {LOVE} her photography!  Just the photo's themselves and the way she edits them.  Absolutely gorgeous.  I have quite a few that I want to order, just need to figure out where exactly I am going to put them. 

Eden's Cove Treasures
I have bought quite a few things from this shop.  I have bought an amazing milk glass lamp, an amazing picture, baskets, and a few other things.  She's amazing to work with and her stuff is always great!

Non Etsy stores that I love are:

They have some really amazing clothes for bigger girls.  When I was growing up I would always have to shop in the women's section.  So my outfits were always screaming "older women" and not "young fun teenager".  As I got older (high school)  I found Lane Bryant and it helped.  Then about 6 years ago I found Torrid and have been hooked ever since.

Hanna & Lola
I {LOVE} this store and I {LOVE} these sisters!  Lorena (Lola) and I have been friends for years.  She and I worked for JC Penney's at the same time and I'm so glad that she came to work there!  Otherwise we probably would have never met.  Her sister LeeAnna (Hanna) is amazing as well!  They are adding more inventory so keep a look out for it!

Christy Grissom, Origami Owl, Independent Designer
Ok, shameless plug but I {LOVE} this product so much!  Every locket tells a story....What's yours?  You can tell a different story every day if you wanted to or keep the same story!  This is my story:

I'll wear my story most days but when I'm feeling vintagey, I'll wear a rose gold locket with a gold sparrow, silver infinity sign, some clear accent stones (really they are April birthstones :), put some watch gears behind it and I'm done.  My other locket consists of a window plate (coming in October) that says Love, a clear accent stone, an aqua stone, an owl, and a bling heart with aqua crystals.  Just depends on my mood.  I might even just wear a necklace with a tag that says "Inspire" and one that says "Fear Not" with a butterfly on the front and on the back it says "Without change, there would be no butterflies", along with an ocean turquoise crystal dangle.

Happy shopping!  Your bank account will thank me later :)

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

It's Texas Tuesday, Ya'll!

I came across Amanda's blog and fell in {love} with it!

I'm a very proud Texan and love anything to do with Texas so this blog and blogger are right up my alley!  She and another blogger have Texas Tuesday's that let you focus on anything to do with Texas!

The first thing that  came to my mind to write about was music.  I {love} music from artists that are from Texas or songs that have to do with Texas.  The music is something that just grabs my attention more than others.  I {love} the song writing aspect of it the most I think.  I love hearing why a song was written, where it was written, what was going on in the song writers life when it was being written.  And their shows....

There is just something about going to a live show.  When I was younger I was at pretty much every show that was going on around west Texas.  They were fun and the music just sounded that much better.  Even live album's are great to me.  You can feel the energy from the crowd that is there and it intensifies the music rather than if it was recorded in a studio.  Ahhh.....I {love} it....

Here is my "short" list of artists that I adore from Texas:

Pat Green (can not have a list like this with out him on it :)
Jack Ingram (again...can not have a list like this with out him)
Ryan Bingham
Kacey Musgraves
Wade Bowen
Radney Foster
Brandon Rhyder
Aaron Watson
Miranda Lambert (Yes, even though she's Nashville, the girl is still from Texas.  And very proud of it)
Bruce Robison
Charlie Robison
Randy Rogers Band
Josh Abott Band
Django Walker
Sunny Sweeney
Walt Wilkins

I seriously could go on forever, but this gives you an idea of what I {love}.  Now go to iTunes or Amazon and get yourselves familiar with these artist's.....

 Not really sure why the link box is so small but I reposted the picture so you could see it.  Click on the picture in the link box to view other awesome blogs for Texas Tuesday :)

Confessions of a Cowboy's Wife

Monday, August 19, 2013

What has happened?

I have been a blogging fool lately!  I mean normally I'm just a fool....

Just kidding about being a fool part.  Well kinda ;)  I have been blogging a lot because I've joined a few blogs that do linked blogging.  That's where they give us a topic to write about and we do, then link it to their blog in hopes of gaining more readers.  It's also to share with one another but for the more readers part too.  But this blog entry has to do with me and what's on my mind.

I'm not sure why but lately when I come across a picture from the past I lose my breath.  I have never been one to hate a picture of myself.  Until lately that is.  Again with the whole denial not denial issue, I honestly just don't think I ever realized how big I was.  I know that I have wrote about this before (and pretty recently) but I just can't help it.  I am in shock I think.

I was going through pictures on my personal Facebook, looking for a picture for an upcoming Show Us Your Life, and came across one that a friend had taken at a direct sales show at her house.  I had forgotten all about it.  I clicked on it and I honestly gasped.  Is that weird?  To know that I 'm looking at myself.  There is nothing weird going on in the picture and I gasped at my own picture.  I feel ashamed that I did that.  I feel ashamed because I do not ever (and will not EVER) be one to turn my nose down to bigger people.  I was there.  From 1989 (that's the year I feel like I ballooned) until Oct. 3rd, 2012, I was there.  I want to help people that are still there.  That don't have the oppritunity that I had to gain such an amazing tool.  I know it can be done!  I want to be the one that will go work out with them and not judge them.  Because I was there!  I was the one that could barely make it around the track twice.  I was the one that would have never tried yoga because getting on the ground was difficult because my knee's hurt to put that much weight on them and then there was the fiasco of getting up.   I want to be the positivity that they need when they can't give it to themselves.  There were many times that I needed that.  And I have friends that would be positive and help me, but unless you've been have absolutely no idea how that life is.  I want to always remember how hard it was and not take for granted how easier it is now.  Knowing that it was extremely hard and now it's easier helps push me to do more things.  Take advantage of the gift I've been given of living and taking advantage of new opportunity's.  For instance, I want to go on a zip line course.  I would have never been able to do that before.  I want to tackle the ferris wheel at the Texas state fair.  I rode it once before and it was horrible.  I believe that I was so scared, not so much for the height but because I feared I was to heavy for it and was making the bucket lean.  There was a wire gate/fence sort of thing that was blocking us and I would not have gone flying out but I felt like I could just because we were leaning and it was leaning only on my side.

I just know I want to be the person to help push them, guide them, and help them reach their goals because like I've said before, it is so much better on this side of the spectrum.  I can't even describe how happy I am...

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Why yes....Yes I am....

Being an antsy Nancy!

Even though it is currently 88 degrees with the high supposed to be 97, I can not stop thinking about getting a new Fall/Winter wardrobe!

I have been thinking about it A LOT lately and it's driving me crazy at some times not being able to buy anything.  I've been pinning a bunch a pins with different boots, outfits, and things like that giving me idea's and that way I remember them when I am able to get to go shopping.  Here are a few of them:

Ok with some of them you can see a trend of what I'm really interested in right now.  I don't know why but I'm obsessed with riding boots right now!  I think they are so cute and easy/comfy to just add to an outfit with out having to think about it.  That's what I like.  Something that is super cute but super comfy.  I was at Kristy's house yesterday, talking to her while she had a garage sale, and she had a pair of knee high boots for sale.  Now we do not wear the same size shoe by any means (if I didn't have such stupid long toes I'd wear the same size as my friends/sister and would be able to steal their shoes...), but I thought "I'm just going to see if the calf part fits".  So I attempted to put on the boot and I didn't get it on all the way (because my foot is bigger than hers) but the calf part seemed to be just fine.  Which I was ecstatic about because I wasn't sure if I was going to have to order my boots from a big girl store that carried wide calf boots or if I was going to be able to buy normie boots at a regular store.  I'm not going to order any until I can go to a store and try on a pair of boots to see if I can in deed just purchase them there.

It will be so fun being able to get a completely new wardrobe.  As you know I just cleaned out my closet (see that post here) and I had a friend come and buy some of my stuff and then I had a garage sale for the rest.  I didn't sell as much as I had hoped, but am glad for what I did sell.  Kristy and I are going to have one more garage sale in September to see if we can get rid of the rest of our stuff and then I will take the money I have made from that and purchase some new clothes.  So keep a look out for that post!

Who knows...I may make it a shopping party and make it a girls day out of it....

Friday, August 16, 2013

I'm gonna pop some tags...Only got $20 in my pocket....

This is pretty awesome...

I {love} thrift stores.  I love just roaming around it, looking for that special gem.  Sometimes you walk away with a steal and sometimes you walk away with nothing.  

Today Kelly blogged about thrift store finds and I had to show these beauty's off!

I found this gem at Ola's Place in Odessa.  She is located at 1514 E. 7th.

I seriously love old things and I always wanted a cake stand like this one.  It reminds me of one that my great grandmother Molly had when I was little.  It's a very sturdy, heavy glass.  I'm not sure if it's worth anything or not but I paid a whole $10 for it.  I haven't made a cake yet to put on it, but it has stored cookies, cereal bars,and sugar free candy's.  I may make a cake this weekend and put it in there!

This next item came from a thrift store in Beeville.

I did have to give it life again by spray painting it gold.  It was a gold to begin with but was really dull and had some rust spots.  I can remember one of my great grandmothers (I'm thinking my Mamaw, my mother's grandmother) having something like this but I'm not certain.  I keep it in my guest room on the night stand.  I think it looks great in there.  Now when little Miss Kenner comes to  visit we have to put it up.  Other wise we end up with tissue all over the house.

I found some of these at Ola's and some at the store in Beeville.

Well the glass milk containers and the turquoise cracker canister.  The Clabber Girl Baking Powder container and flowers came from my Nana.  When I was thinking about what to put in my dining room and came across those I knew I had to have them.  

I found this at a thrift store/flea market type of place called Bea's in Hobbs, NM.

I had gone over there in search of big chunky frames for a project I was going to make off of Pintrest, but when I got there, the frames weren't what I was looking for.  So I just looked around for a little bit and came across this.  This is a very good size wash basin and pitcher.  Good and heavy.  I bought this for $20!  I was shocked because I thought it would have been more expensive just because of how big and heavy it was.  

I know that you can find mason jars all over the place now days but the one in the middle is what I love.  I found this one at Ola's.

I love the color of it!  It was made in the 70's and it still has the rubber sealer inside of it for someone to use it to can something.  I just love the way it looks with the Fiesta Ware tea cups and the other 2 mason jars.  I could kick myself for not getting more than one.  They were only a couple of dollars.  This is a Ball brand jar as well.  

I feel a trip to Ola's coming on soon.....

Five on Friday

I got five on it....(anytime I hear 5 I think of that song :)

I started reading a new blogger and her post today was Five on Friday and I thought "What a great idea!"  So I went to the original bloggers post and read what it was all about.  Basically you blog 5 things that are on your mind.  So I present to you.... Christy's Five on Friday

Five:  I'm kinda sad that I missed the Kidd Kraddick memorial yesterday.  I wonder if it will be posted on their website....

Four:  I want a fun new background for my blog that someone creates for me but I don't want to spend an arm and a leg on it...

Three:  I shouldn't have just eaten that cookie...

Two:  I need to close Stephanie's Origami Owl party.....

One:  I don't know why this has been on my mind so much latley but I'm so excited about it.  I get to get a complete new wardrobe for fall and winter!  I keep thinking about the direction I want it to go and keep pinning somethings.  So far it looks like a lot of knee high boots, tights/skinny jeans, sweaters or light tops with a sweater over it, and scarves.  I may go and try on some boots made for normie's (normal people :) and see how the calves fit.  If they don't fit I'll order from Woman Within or Roaman's since they offer wide calf sizes.

What's your 5 on Friday?

Wednesday, August 14, 2013


Why do we get attached to the weirdest things?

The first time I cleaned my closet out during this process was a bit weird and odd to me.  Even though I knew these clothes did not fit me anymore, I felt like I wanted to hold on to them for some reason.  Almost as if I thought I would need them again one day.  Looking at them I'd think "Oh, I can still wear this!"  So I would try it on and no, no I couldn't.  I had to convince myself that I needed to just get rid of them.  I did however hold on to a few tops and such a little longer than I should have the first go-around.  The 2nd time was a little bit easier.  I still felt like I was giving a piece of me away for some reason, but I reluctantly got rid of them.  I just went through my closet for the 3rd cleaning.  I was getting stuff out and saying "Ok, that has to go" and then I would come across something that I would have to try on to tell myself they were to big.  Even if they were big but not ridiculously big I still got rid of them.  It wouldn't be long until they were way to big for me and I didn't need them taking up space in my closet.  I had two shrugs that I absolutely loved that I finally got rid of.  They were just nice to throw on over a t-shirt and not have to think about a jacket.  Some of you know how much I loved them because I wore them all the time.  There were things this round also that I never even got to wear.

These two dresses I never even got to wear.  The first one I got at JC Penney's one the 3,434,823 time I worked there in 2007.  It didn't fit when I bought it and was one of those "I'll lose 10 more pounds and get into it....."  Fast forward 6 years later, I finally was able to wear it....with no where to wear it to.  For those of you that don't know me, I do drug testing and deal with oilfield men all day.  There is no way I could wear that to work.  Some would say that I should and I might pick up a man, but that is quite alright.  The 2nd dress I bought in 2008 to wear to my best friends bridal shower.  When I got it in it was a little snug.  "I'll lose 10 lbs...." I said.  Ya I'm pretty sure I GAINED 10 lbs. instead of LOSE 10 lbs.  Again, fast forward 5 years and it place to wear it.  It's getting to be on the big side so I will probably just cut my ties with them and sell them in a garage sale.  Oh who knows...I may put one on and take myself on a date :)

And this ladies and gentlemen, is my ALL TIME favorite sweatshirt....ever. EVER. eeeeevvvveerrrrrr.  I have had this sweatshirt since 1997.  Yep, that's over 16 years ago this summer.  I got it when we went to church camp at Howard Payne in Brownwood.  I can not bare to get rid of it.  I guess it's like my security blanket.  In the winter when I get lazy days, I put this on and grab a blanket and have a movie lazy day with my couch.  One day a friend from high school that had been at that camp with me saw it and said "Oh my gosh!  You still have that thing?"  Um yes, yes I do.
I always will :)  I can't bring myself to get rid of it.

I probably will one day, but with all the changes going on in my closet, I need to hang on to some familiarity.

Texas Women Bloggers

Sunday, August 11, 2013

A Few Of My Favorite Things

Rain drops on roses, whiskers on kittens....

Ok maybe those don't have anything to do with these products but it just felt right.

There are some things since having the surgery that have changed in my life.  Other than the other stuff I talk about (weight, clothes, mind set), things in my cabinet have changed.

As a bariatric patient we are required to have so many grams of protein a day.  My doctor prefers that I have 60-80 grams of protein (in liquid form) a day.  So the normal protein drinks from AdvoCare, Mona Vie, Slim Fast, are just not going to cut it.  If I were to drink those I would have to drink at least 5 a day to get at least 60 grams a day.  Now you have figure in the fact that I can't drink 30 minutes before I eat, while I eat, or for 30 minutes after I eat.  When would I have time to fit that many drinks in?  And can my stomach hold that much liquid from 5 protein drinks.  That's where my first two favorite items come into play.

The first picture is of Premier Protein drinks.  I love the fact that they are pre made (makes my hectic life easier) and they don't have that terrible chalky taste that some do.  They have 30 grams of protein in them, 160 calories, 3 grams of fat, and 1 gram of sugar.  You can not beat that!  Plus it gives you a satisfied feeling, and that's always a plus!  I usually drink one in the morning and one in the afternoon.  You have to break it up because your body can only absorb so many grams of protein at a time.
The second picture is of Isopure.  Funny story about this drink.  When I had my surgery the hospital gave me Isopure to drink (or as I called them shots because I would just sip on a little cup that looked like a little shot glass) and when I was being discharged they gave me some to take home with me.  My mom insisted that we put the Isopure in the bag that contained all of my medicines and blood thinner shots that I was taking on the airplane with me.  I didn't want to but I wasn't in a state to argue.  So in the bag they went.  We get to the airport and we are gong through security.  I had gave them the bag with all the medicines, shots, protein drinks, for them to check out.  Security could have cared less for all the narcotics I had in my bag, but this protein drink (which was in a plastic bottle) caused so many red flags.  I was escorted to the side and they wiped the bottle down, then wiped my hands down for bomb residue.  I was so upset I said "I don't even want the stupid protein drink, just throw it away!".  The security guy said "I'm sorry ma'am it's red flagged and now you are too".  I was escorted to sit down because I was turning pale considering I had just had major surgery!  A really nice woman security guard came over to chat and make sure I didn't jump up and run.  They ended up letting me take the protein drinks and leave.  It really is a funny memory but at the time I didn't find it funny but now I do.  Good times, good times.  About the drink itself though, it has 40 grams of protein, 160 calories, 0 fat, and 0 sugar.  I hadn't found any since having my surgery and wasn't about to order a bunch online, but I recently found them in Thriftway.  Yes....I said Thriftway.  They are getting more and more items that you can find at a health food store in their store.  It's amazing!  Love it!  Now don't get me wrong.  I still love my H-E-B, but if I don't have the time or energy to go over there I do not mind going to Thriftway to purchase my groceries. 

*Side note:  Protein helps you stay satisfied longer and helps burn more calories than fat in the digestive process*

Greek yogurt.  Especially raspberry, has saved my life.  I loved greek yogurt to begin with but since my surgery it's been a saving grace.  I don't always feel like eating because but I know I have to so I will just eat a greek yogurt and it totally does the job.  I have had so many people say they can't stand greek yogurt and I honestly don't understand why.  Yes, it is a thicker consistency but don't you feel more satisfied with it than regular yogurt?

Now this is something I came across in a health food store in Lubbock one day.  I only bought one to try (the peanut butter one.  I know, you're shocked it was peanut butter right? I heart peanut butter) and Drake, Felicia, and myself chomped down on it.  It was so good!  Drake (who was 3 at the time) wanted more!  Little did he know it was healthy for you!  It's a vegan/gluten free cookie.  And let me say this.  I am not a vegan or a gluten free person all the way, but if I can still enjoy sweets (and still in moderation) and they are vegan/gluten free, why not pick the better of the 2.   The only bad thing is the calories on it.  It is 230 for one serving and each cookie is 2 servings.  So if you buy this cookie plan on sharing with a friend, or 2 :)

Ok I know I just did a cookie but these are amazing!  The very first time I saw these cookies was at Thriftway (yes again :) and it was around the holidays.  They had chocolate mint (my favorite) and sugar cookie.  I got a box of each and when I tried them.....I was in love.  I'm sure those flavors were seasonal, but I found these gems the other day at Natural Food Market.  The serving size is 3 cookies (plenty to get your sweet tooth fix), around 130 calories (I'm saying around because the chocolate chip is 130 and the oatmeal is 120), around 5 grams of fat, around 12 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.  The cookies were created because Dr. Lucy's daughter had many allergies and she couldn't find high quality cookies that tasted she made her own :)

Now which cookie am I going to have for desert tonight?

Friday, August 9, 2013

My Very First "Show Us Your Life" Post!

Ahhhhhhhhh!  I'm so excited!!!

I am finally getting to participate with a Show Us Your Life from Kelly's Korner!  It's not that there haven't been some I could participate with, I just lolligagged until it was to late to do it.  Or I guess I couldn've done it and been fashionably late...

This week's Show Us Your Life is favorite aps.  I have some that are amazing and I love so much :)  (I love some more than others but couldn't bring my self to number them :)

Styleseat:  I {LOVE} this ap!  If you are in the beauty industry it helps me SO much!  I can keep track of my appointments through it and it will send a reminder text and/or email to your customer the day before.  You can also get to it if you're on a desktop computer and schedule.  It will send you an email once a day telling you your schedule.  It will also have how much you made the day before.  Once a week it will send you an email telling you what the projected number is for your sales the upcoming week and how much it was the week before.  At the end of the year you can print off a report and it will tell you how much you made for tax purposes. 

Fastcustomer :  Oh.My.Gosh.  When my friend Amber first told me about this ap, I thought "Ya ok, I'll check it out later"  and never did. This ap is a lifesaver!  Say you needed to call your cable company and they are notorious about a long hold time.  You go to your Fastcustomer ap, they call for you, sit on hold FOR you, then will ring you back when it's connecting to someone.  It's awesome!

PayAnywhere :  If you are in direct sales or have your own side business, it is perfect!  You can accept credit cards anywhere you are at and then it will be deposited into your bank account!  It's easy for you and your customers will appreciate being able to use their card instead of having to have cash or writing a check.

AOL Radio :  That's right.  I said AOL. As in American Online.  When I hear "You've Got Mail" it takes me back to my younger years.  But back in the day I would listen to AOL Radio.  It's still around and still amazing!  My favorite stations are 90's country and 90's pop.  I've also added 00's country and 00's pop.  Ya I love taking it old school...

A Beautiful Mess :  With this ap you can edit photo's, add words, borders, etc.  It's pretty awesome

Instagram : Ok seriously if you don't know what Instagram....I'm worried about you :)  But for those that might have been under a rock it is an amazing community where you can edit photo's or now  video's and post them.  It's pretty awesome as well.  You can follow me here.

Bandsintown :  This ap will scan your music library, then tell you who all is in concert within a so many mile radius of you.  It's pretty awesome if you're wanting to see a show but have no idea who's where, this ap will tell you.  You can also RSVP for shows and connect to Facebook to see what friends have RSVP'd to what shows.

Red Cross Tornado :  Like your weather ap it will notify you when severe weather is near you.  What it does do that your weather ap won't do is give you the option to notify the Red Cross that you are ok, if there were to be a tornado or such in your area, so that you are accounted for.  That is located in the Tool Kit section of it.  The Tool Kit also includes a flashlight, strobe light, alarm, and test siren.

SnipSnap :  If you're a coupon junkie this ap is for you!  I am not a coupon junkie but it is nice to be in the store and check out and see if you can find coupons for different things and save yourself some money.  It'll virtually snip it for you and then you just present your phone to the cashier.  Pretty easy :)

Phase 10:  I have to have at least one game in here.  And I didn't want to put the typical Angry Birds, Candy Crush, Words with Friends, etc.  I love playing actual Phase 10 and so this is perfect when I want to play but don't have anyone around to play against.  And if you have to get out of it for some reason, when you return to the ap, it is right where you left off :)

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Just Keep Swimming

It's been 10 months...1 day....

I can't believe it's fixing to be my one year surgaversary!  Only 2 months left!  I posted a comparison picture on Facebook but wanted to post a different one for my blog (you know gotta keep the blog fresh :). 

The picture on the left was taken 49 weeks ago (according to Instagram) and the pic on the right was taken a week ago.  It's amazing how 10 months have changed my life.  I recently watched a video that I made for Extreme Makeover:Weight loss Edition and it was the part where I gave a full body shot so they could see all of me (one day I may try to do a still shot and do a comparison to it).  I'm not sure if I was in denial or just really did not know how big I had gotten.   I don't think I was in denial because I never denied that I was big, but I really honestly did not realize how big I was.  At the time I don't feel like I was depressed either, I mean ya we all have days that aren't that great but I don't feel I was in deep depression.  I feel more than anything I was numb.  Numb to how big I was, numb to feeling like that was all I was ever going to be, numb to a lonely life.   I know more than anyone that it sucks to feel like I am never going to get this weight off.  When you have so much to lose you start out and ya you may lose 60 lbs and to the normal person that would be great.  We (bigger people) get overwhelmed thinking about how much more you have to lose.  It is VERY overwhelming.  Even though I was one of those that it did happen to and I ended up gaining it back and then some, ended up being fortunate enough to have a surgery to use as a super tool to lose the weight, I want to encourage those that have done great so far on their weight loss to not give up.  It can feel like your going up a river while you're losing weight, but if you stop on the side of the bank, it is such an easy ride to right back to where you were down the river.  And when you start back again, it is as if you are going back up the river but with 10 pound weights on your ankles.   Don't stop!  You will eventually get there.  And all I can say is this side of the spectrum, being able to actually live....It's so much better than I EVER imagined. 

Just like Dory from Finding Nemo says .... "Just keep swimming"